As I sit here writing this, surrounded by boxes of baby clothes, a half-assembled crib, and approximately seventeen different “must-have” baby products (according to various internet lists), I’m feeling a mixture of excitement, terror, and absolute wonder. We’re having a baby.
Let me say that again: WE’RE HAVING A BABY.
It still doesn’t feel quite real, even though the nursery is taking shape, the due date is getting closer, and I can feel this little person moving around inside me. James and I are about to become parents, and I’m trying to document this journey before everything becomes a sleep-deprived blur.
The Nursery Project
Decorating the nursery has been both the most fun and most overwhelming part of preparing for baby’s arrival. I had all these grand visions of a perfectly coordinated, Instagram-worthy space. Then reality set in: babies need a LOT of stuff, and Pinterest-perfect rooms don’t account for the 47 different types of swaddles and blankets you apparently need.
We decided on a nature-inspired theme with soft greens, warm woods, and touches of coral. I’ve been working on some handmade artwork for the walls—one of the joys of being crafty is being able to create something personal and meaningful for our little one’s space.
James, bless him, has become the king of furniture assembly. He’s put together the crib (twice—the first time we realized we needed to move it to a different wall), the dresser/changing table combo, a rocking chair, and various organizational systems. He jokes that he’s building his baby preparation skills one Allen wrench at a time.
The nursery window looks out over our backyard, and I love imagining all the mornings we’ll spend there—rocking the baby, watching the sunrise, starting our days together as a new family of four (counting Dax, of course).
What I’m Learning
Preparation is both everything and nothing. Yes, you need the basics—a safe place for baby to sleep, diapers, clothes, feeding supplies. But no amount of preparation fully prepares you for the actual experience of having a newborn. I’m learning to be okay with that paradox.
Everyone has opinions. And they WILL share them. Some are helpful. Some are… less so. I’m getting better at smiling, saying “thank you,” and then doing whatever feels right for us.
It’s okay to feel scared. I’ve had moments of pure panic. What if we’re not ready? What if we mess this up? What if I’m not cut out for this? Then I talk to James, or spend time with Dax (our first “baby”), or feel the baby move, and I remember: we’re going to figure it out together. That’s what families do.
Self-care matters more than ever. Between the physical changes, the emotional ups and downs, and all the preparation, it’s easy to forget to take care of myself. But I’m trying to maintain my practices—meditation, reading, crafting—because I know I’ll be a better mom if I’m also taking care of Namibia.
The Things I Didn’t Expect
Nobody tells you about the weird dreams. Or how emotional you’ll get over the tiniest baby clothes. Or how you’ll find yourself talking to your belly like your baby can already understand complex sentences (they probably can’t, but I do it anyway).
Nobody tells you how your relationship with your partner will deepen in new ways. Watching James prepare to be a dad—reading parenting books, baby-proofing the house, talking to my belly about his day—has made me fall in love with him all over again.
And nobody tells you how much your perspective shifts. Things that seemed important before feel less so. Things you never thought much about suddenly seem crucial. You start thinking in terms of “before baby” and “after baby,” and you realize your whole life is about to change in the most beautiful, terrifying, wonderful way.
What James Is Up To
While I’m nesting and crafting and obsessing over the nursery, James has been in full preparation mode in his own way. He’s researching car seats like it’s his full-time job (apparently there are significant safety differences between models—who knew?). He’s been childproofing the house, even though the baby won’t be mobile for months. He keeps adding to his running list of “Dad Skills to Learn” (current items include: swaddling techniques, diaper-changing speed records, and how to install a car seat properly).
He also talks to the baby every night before bed. Sometimes he tells them about his day, sometimes he reads aloud from whatever book he’s currently reading, sometimes he just says hello and tells them how excited he is to meet them. It’s possibly the sweetest thing I’ve ever witnessed.
Dax’s Adjustment
Oh, Dax. Our good boy has NO idea what’s coming. We’ve been trying to prepare him—letting him sniff baby items, showing him the nursery, gradually adjusting his routine—but I think the reality of a crying baby in the house is going to be quite a shock for him.
That said, if anyone can handle the adjustment, it’s Dax. He’s the most patient, loving dog I’ve ever known. I have no doubt he’ll be an amazing big brother.
The Home Stretch
We’re in the final weeks now. The nursery is nearly done. The hospital bag is packed. We’ve taken the classes, read the books, watched the videos. We’re as ready as we’re going to be.
And yet I know that nothing will truly prepare us for the moment we meet this little person we’ve been waiting for. The moment our family of three (four, including Dax) becomes a family of four (five, including Dax—see, we can’t even get the numbers right and the baby isn’t even here yet).
But that’s okay. We’ll figure it out. We’ll learn as we go. We’ll make mistakes and we’ll have victories. We’ll be exhausted and exhilarated. We’ll wonder what we’ve gotten ourselves into, and we’ll marvel at the miracle of new life.
And through it all, we’ll have each other. James, me, Dax, and soon, our baby.
I can’t wait.
To all the parents out there: What’s the one piece of advice you wish someone had given you before your first baby arrived? And what’s the one thing you worried about that turned out to not matter at all?
To all the expecting parents: How are you preparing? What are you most excited about? What are you most nervous about? Let’s support each other on this wild journey!